Pithy Comments

Census: In case you missed my prior posts (hard to believe, right) today is either March 30 or March 31, depending on when you read this, and which side of the International Dateline you are on and Thursday is probably April 1,  April Fools Day. You can finally mail in your census form with accurate information . The fact that it is April Fools Day has nothing to do with your legal obligation to answer all questions truthfully. Personally, I intend to tell the truth about the 371 people living in my house.

Wives:

My wife just had plastic surgery. I took away her credit cards.

My wife’s meals are something to behold. Not eat, just behold.

My wife is the sweetest, most tolerant,most beautiful person in the whole world. This is a paid political announcement.

I miss my wife’s cooking — as often as I can.

I wouldn’t say my wife is a poor housekeeper. She doesn’t turn on the stove. She just lights the grease.

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