A practical nurse is one who marries a rich patient.

I once had a very good nurse. When she took my blood pressure, she deducted 20 points for cleavage.

Nurse to eGrumps in hospital: “I can only please one patient per day. Today isn’t your day. Tomorrow’s not looking good either.”

Top Reasons to Become a Nurse (from www.nursingfun.com – thanks)

Pays better then fast food, though the hours aren’t as good.

Fashionable shoes and sexy white uniforms.

Needles: “Tis better to give than receive”

Reassure your patients that all bleeding stops…eventually.

Expose yourself to rare, exciting and new diseases.

Interesting aromas.

Courteous and infallible doctors who always leave clear orders in perfectly legible handwriting.

Celebrate all the holidays with your friends at work.

Take comfort that most of your patients survive no matter what you do to them.

EGrumps to all the nurses that have taken care of me in sickness and health. When I was in good health, the transformation to sickness was almost painless, and I survived – so far. When I was in poor health, I survived – so far. So who needed you? Thanks anyhow, Ladies.

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