Sorry team, I’ve been out of action for about a week. It’s amazing what one must give up when your spouse is sick. I think my priorities are somewhat screwed up, but she doesn’t think so.
“My dad told me. “Anything worth having is worth waiting for.” I waited until I was fifteen.”( Zsa Zsa Gabor.)
“Not tonight, Josephine.” (Napoleon)
“It’s not the men in my life that count, it’s the life in my men.” (Mae West)
“A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me and she said “No.” (Woody Allen)
“Seduction is often difficult to distinguish from rape. In seduction, the rapist bothers to buy a bottle of wine.” (Andrea Dworkin)
Sex was a competitive event in those days and the only thing you could take as a certainty was that everyone else was lying, just as you were.” (Bob Geldof)
“Your idea of fidelity was not having more than one man in bed at the same time.” (Fredric Raphel.”
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Tags: Funny Quotations, Humor, Jokes, Jokes One Line, One Line Jokes, Pithy Comment, Wit
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Slightly Off-Color One Liners – Jokes, Humor & Pithy Comments – (from eGrumps) -June 21, 2010.
Sorry team, I’ve been out of action for about a week. It’s amazing what one must give up when your spouse is sick. I think my priorities are somewhat screwed up, but she doesn’t think so.
“My dad told me. “Anything worth having is worth waiting for.” I waited until I was fifteen.”( Zsa Zsa Gabor.)
“Not tonight, Josephine.” (Napoleon)
“It’s not the men in my life that count, it’s the life in my men.” (Mae West)
“A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me and she said “No.” (Woody Allen)
“Seduction is often difficult to distinguish from rape. In seduction, the rapist bothers to buy a bottle of wine.” (Andrea Dworkin)
Sex was a competitive event in those days and the only thing you could take as a certainty was that everyone else was lying, just as you were.” (Bob Geldof)
“Your idea of fidelity was not having more than one man in bed at the same time.” (Fredric Raphel.”
________________________________________________
Tags: Funny Quotations, Humor, Jokes, Jokes One Line, One Line Jokes, Pithy Comment, Wit
This entry was posted on Monday, June 21st, 2010 at 9:53 pm and is filed under Humor, Pithy Comments, Uncategorized, Wit. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.